Article 1 – Healthy and Sane-ish

My new daily mantra to myself is “I’m healthy and sane…-ish!”

When I wake up and don’t feel like getting out of bed, or when I obsess about all of the things I need to do but don’t have enough hours in the day to get it all done…”I’m healthy and sane…ish!!!”

I actually have a really great life beyond these 2 aspects.  I have a career that feeds my soul, I have a wonderful husband, I am financially stable, and I am surrounded by an amazing village.

But also, in my world, especially in my immediate family, these 2 aspects are short in supply.  There’s uncurable cancer, bipolar disorder, and with my dad, heart failure, PTSD and dementia.

As many can imagine, having loved ones who basically suffer in some form daily, can be stressful and overwhelming.  It’s a daily battle to find balance:

How do I help my loved ones and at the same time enjoy life?

How do I enjoy life and not feel guilty that I’m not doing something to assist my family?

Well, I do my best to STAY healthy and sane.  I workout, I eat healthy, I dance.  I spend time with my village, I travel.  I hug and kiss my husband everyday.  Because the worst thing I can do is not take advantage of the gift of being healthy and sane.  The most disrespectful thing I can do is take my life for granted.

So why am I writing about this?  Why am I putting my business out there?

I am a care-giver.  I am often my family’s rock.  I didn’t ask to be put in this role but here I am.  And this role is somewhat lonely.  I was amazed at how little people talk about having this role; how people keep their struggle hidden.  But I know so many people are in my situation.  More importantly, I know that many more people (especially in my age group) will be in my situation.  I hope that by sharing my experience, others will know that they are not alone.  I am going to share my struggles, things I’ve learned that make life easier, and my mistakes.  I will even share what I have yet to figure out because hopefully this is the beginning of an exchange and not just me talking at people.

I mentioned my dad earlier.  He currently lives in a nursing home and I am his medical designee and I have power of attorney.  Three years ago he almost died because his dementia was undiagnosed (more on that in a future article).  But now his condition is stable.  He will never be cured, but for now he is maintaining and that is a blessing.

Most of what I write about will be centered around him and his care.  And how it has affected my life and the lives of my family… how my husband and I have made changes to prepare for our own future, physically, emotionally and financially.

I’m looking forward to sharing and growing with this experience.

Anne